Debate I had with a friend. I thought it was interesting. So here are my replies.
Nancy- So you don't believe that being gay is simply and solely based on... genetics?..
Me- It could be genetics. Or, perhaps our bodies are just shells. Who we really are, our true and basic identity, is what is on the inside. Our interests would be the same despite what "shell" we are born with.
Women are known as more "girly"- makeup, sexy clothing, etc.
Men, well you know. The stereotypes.
But if we are born with a feminine body; we grow up learning how to flatter the shells we have. Curvy body, sexy clothing. Masculine body, etc.
Anyway, I think it's part "genetics" but also, you are a product of your surroundings. Physically who we are and emotionally and mentally who we are, are two completely separate things, that learn to work together when we are born.
Nancy- But, one of the huge gay arguments is that, just how you're genetically programmed to have brown hair, brown eyes, etc, your genes also apply to your sexual preferences... ''Being gay isn't a choice, you are born that way''.
What about that?
Me- I see. You're saying, we are born homosexual- Attracted to whatever sex we are, rather than born attracted to males or females. Hmm. I'd have to think about that. It's difficult to hold a debate on something like this when I myself am not sure.
You know, I could debate either side with just as much ease (or difficulty).
If I were to go with what I said earlier, in a sense it's just as strong of an argument as saying we are born gay...... because it still leaves the declaration that we DON'T choose who we are attracted towards. It still leaves it with genetics and not choice.
Like playing the lottery.
You will be born with:
a. brown eyes
b. green eyes
c. etc
Attracted to:
a. woman
b. men
c. both, etc
You will have:
a. ovaries
b. a wee-wee, etc
And so on and so forth.
The combination = "enter title here"
Perhaps you have the gene that makes you attracted to woman.
Also, you have the gene that makes you born with ovaries.
These two genes together (the combination) = "lesbian"
The assumption that there is one single gene that determines your sexuality can be (might not be though) seen as ludicrous.
There could be two separate genes that, when combined, EQUAL homosexuality, rather than there being just one single "gay gene".
Either way, the conclusion is we do not choose our sexuality. We are born with the genes and traits that, when mixed, determine your unique sexuality- all based on the combination.
But you know, just as a side note, let me express my thoughts in a less "deep and philosophical" way…
Sometimes I wonder. Was I born lesbian? How do I know? I don't know, I mean, I know I love woman. I love them, I am in love with them, I am comfortable and safe and I dream of them. My attraction is all around and back again. I used to have crushes on guys when I was much younger, but really they weren't much of anything, it was to fit in and join in the conversations of "omg he is soooo hot omg omg". I was an outcast during these crucial times during a young girl's life when our lives seemingly revolved around continuous puppy love. The goofy, childish little girl talks. Girls always swooning over celebrities. I was never like that with men/boys. But I went along with it, I grasped my teensy tiny little bit of attraction toward boys and tried to go with it.
Anyway, I don't really know what I'm getting at. But I can't really tell you straight up that I was born gay. It is a choice, it is my choice to be with woman, to love woman. Or is the choice just that I've decided to LET myself love woman? Is it in my nature?
It kind of ties in to the argument of fate vs. free will. You think you are choosing what to do with your life, your next step. Will you run or will you wait? Will you try the drugs or will you stay away? Will you trip and fall or hold you're ground? You can stand there, thinking, you are going to choose a different route than what feels to be the route you are "supposed" to take. But it could just be in your fate to think those exact same thoughts. It's a loop you can just keep following over and over and over again until. Well, until you just pass out of exhaustion and irritation. Until there is a scientific way to provide an answer, how the hell can we know? Really, we can never know for certain. Or at least be comfortable and able to accept the answer we find. Will we even be able to let ourselves accept the answer we find?
(This isn't necessarily my opinion, it's just a possibility...)
A thought- If we are talking genetics, then the issue is of the "gay-gene" being a recessive trait because obviously homosexuals are a minority.
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